A Must Read for Every Parent

My sister is a high school English teacher. While reading The Grapes of Wrath, a story about a family who is evicted from their farm by the bank during the Dust Bowl and forced to journey to California in search of work, her students were asked to write a Travel Journal of their own. They were asked to write about a journey that they have taken, that either physically or emotionally changed them.

For every parent who wonders how their separation or divorce will affect their children, this 14-year-old’s essay summed it up in the most eloquent way.

(Permission was granted by the student to post her essay. The names have been changed.)

I can remember the memories of my childhood and early days of life so well. These moments of existence run through my brain at the strangest times. While I am lying in my bed, waiting for sleep to capture me, a recollection flows through my mind like a film reel playing a movie.

I am five years old without a care in the world. I feel my mom’s warm skin on mine as she holds onto my waist so I will not topple over. I put one foot in front of the other, balancing on the steps that lead to the place I used to believe was magical. The great and majestic Disney World stands before me as I embrace my mother’s touch and don’t plan on letting go. We pose in front of my dad’s camera, and my mom lends me her big sun hat so I will not burn. My dad is laughing as the hat nearly covers my face entirely. There is nothing that can ruin this moment of joy and laughter; nothing can even come close.

Or maybe as I sit in the car next to my dad on the way to the grocery store, a memory of perfect unity whooshes through my brain. After riding in the car for this long, all I want to do is jump in a pool. The car halts suddenly, and I spring out of the car and dash into the beautiful North Carolina home. I quickly put on my bathing suit and run to the pool that awaits me with my sister close behind. Holding hands, we jump in unison and splash into the cool and clear pool. My head pops up for air, when two feet away from me I spot a frog moving his long webbed feet back and forth. I squeal with both excitement and fear. This combination of emotion immediately turns into laughter when I see the expression on my sister’s face. I cannot stop laughing, and once again, I am in a perfect moment.

No matter how hard I wish or how much I pray these moments will last forever, they simply do not. An instant of unity and happiness can end in a second and no longer return. One moment I am laughing with my sister or wrapped in my mom’s arms. The next I am with unfamiliar people in an unknown situation. 

I sit in the car behind my dad and scan the people present. Next to me is my sister and on the other side is “him.” My dad sits in the driver’s seat and in the passenger’s seat is “her.” “Her,” otherwise known as Sarah is my dad’s girlfriend and “him” is Zach, Sarah’s son. I do not dislike Sarah and Zach and I do not wish they were gone. In fact, I enjoy their company and am even glad they are in my life. However, I have come to the realization that those moments I dream about randomly will no longer occur. I will no longer be wrapped in my mother’s arms, my dad taking a picture, at least not at the same time. I must learn that this is my new “family.” This is my new unity.

If someone were to ask me about a journey that I have taken that changed me, physically or emotionally, this event in my life is both. This moment in my life of riding in a car with new people that I must get used to is a physical journey as we are actually taking a vacation together. However, this moment is also an emotional journey as I must learn to transition from what I know and love to an unknown territory of life. As I first begin this journey, I am unsure of what is to come. I do not know how to act, what to do, or what to say. I do not know how this trip will qualify as a vacation without the love and happiness my mom brings.

But I do know one thing, which is that I must adapt to changes in my life and continue on. Through this vacation I will begin to understand that changes in life do not mean the end of the world. People, objects, or events may no longer be the same, but they are not gone. They are still in your life, but they just aren’t next to you anymore. They are no longer holding you close and holding onto your waist so you do not fall.